my obsession with romance

I have an obsession with romance and finding love even though I never put myself out there. No, I know, I'm not gonna find love sitting on my arse. I keep telling myself it's not the right time, but even as I'm sitting here typing this, I'm realising it's a lie. I've always deep down, known it's a lie, I've just not wanted to admit it to myself.

He's just not here yet.

Now I know that doesn't seem like a big deal. You're 20, he'll come, get over it you loser. But it's so frustrating. TV, films, books all hype up love so much making it seem like THAT'S what life is all about: love. And in a way, maybe it is? I don't know. It's too much to start discussing the meaning of life.

My point is: even my first little encounter with love..(albeit it was an online one. Not that it was with a stranger! It was Ajay, we all know him. The boy I went to school with who I semi-madly fell in love with..I'm getting side-tracked again.) Even my first little encounter with love left a bittersweet taste in my mouth making me crave more.

Everything in our lives, whether an awkward glance between yourself and a incredibly hot guy (who couldn't have possibly been looking at you on purpose!) or that stupid song that keeps reminding you of said hot guy..well all these things are screaming that love is the answer to all your problems.

It's not. But here's to wishful thinking.

Today's thought of the day that I have to constantly remind myself:

Thoughts for a new name for my blog: "My very private, personal online journal."
What do you reckon?